In case you didn’t guess it already, I am a fan of Lord Of the Rings. In it, Bilbo wanted to go back and revisit all of the places from his previous adventure. It sounded like an excellent idea to reminisce days gone by and remember the danger, the victories, and the hard-won friendships.
However, from my perspective, re-living the pain and discomfort, the hot, sweaty days and never ending cravings from my first weight loss adventure does not sound romantic or even fun.
On the first round, it was exhilarating to see the number on the scale come down. With every tenth of an ounce gone, my confidence built and my hope increased.
Doing all of this a second time brought disappointment. Didn’t I already change that number? Didn’t I vow not to go back here? There was that horrid number on the scale, every number I did not want to see.
How did I end up back here again? No single thing that put the pounds back on my backside, fronts idea and everywhere in between. No, it was little things. Life.
My schedule got crazy. The gym I worked out in closed down and I lost money with it. I had other excuses for not working out. Exhaustion was among them, working long hours with too many bills to pay.
My cravings were aginst me. They attacked me at all hours and at random times. I had little to no warning, and they never seemed to hit when my armor was up.
Then, my very body worked for the other team. It suffered from injuries that slowed me down. Not to mention my very own thyroid decided just to slow down and take it easy for a while. PCOS and vitamin D deficiency were not on my side either.
However, there was something different this time around. This time, I am equipped with the knowledge I had to fight hard to earn the first time, the battle scars that are visible but represent so much more.
Now, this journey will lead to victory. A permanent victory, for now, I am stronger, wiser and tired of losing. Victors don’t quit, no matter how hard the path may be and I am a winner.